Pavla: What’s that you’ve got written on your sweatshirt? It’s English, isn’t it?

Tim: No it’s not, it’s Dutch

Pavla: And what’s it mean?

Tim: Something positive, like shift your fat arse, or something like that.

Pavla: Listen, something’s just occurred to me. What language do you speak at home?

Tim: Czech with mum, and Dutch with dad.

Pavla: Get away! How do you manage it?

Tim: It’s normal, what’s so special about that?

Pavla: I can’t image having to translate what I want to say to my mum.

Tim: Who said anything about translating? I don’t translate anything. It’s not like when you learn English.

Pavla: What’s it like then?

Tim: Basically I’ve got a mother tongue and a father tongue.

Pavla: You what? That’s the first time I’ve heard of that.

Tim: It’s the result of dad always speaking Dutch to me and mum always speaking Czech. The fact that they’re two separate languages was something I only really realised at school..

Pavla: God, I could do with some of that in English.